My apologizes for disappearing, unannounced and unexpectedly, for so long. Given my track record and history prior to these last few years, I’m actually impressed with myself that is never happened sooner. I tend to be obsessive, but also to burn out or lose interest quickly. Having had semi-reliable posts on this blog, and before, on the photo blog, for this long is quite an achievement for me.
Three weeks ago, I reached a burn out point. I had been immersed in reminders of injustice, via the internet and unpleasantness with my bosses at work, and needed a break from my outrage. About a week after that, a quick succession of annoyances happened; the gas-efficient car with which I had been commuting broke its engine, I realized my dreams and life-goal-achieving plans for the summer probably weren’t going to happen and I needed to rethink my near-future, my laptop power adapter died, I started falling back into old and unhelpful thought-patterns, etc. Last week, I spent house-sitting for some friends, away from distractions and family, while taking care of their two cats, two dogs, and four chickens. I was just starting to relax from everything when it was over and time to come home.
Which brings us to now.
I have no idea what the future will bring me. No one ever does, really, but now I don’t even have plans to fall back on; everything is up in the air right at the moment.
I’m still trying to recover my emotional and mental stability. I hurt right now, but I’ve hurt before and recovered. I just don’t know how long it will take or what will trigger the healing I need. The things I was aiming towards helping with that aren’t in the picture anymore (my plans for the summer), and I’m trying to get my footing on slippery ground.
I don’t know if I’ll be writing in this blog much for a while. I might, I might not. I don’t know what kind of content I’ll be adding. I need to reduce pressure in my life where and how I can, and this is one of the very few things I can control. When I need to vent or create, and writing posts is a helpful outlet for that goal, then I will use it. When it isn’t, I won’t.
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I hope the paths in your life open clearly before you, and that the ways to growth are easy to tread with just enough challenge to keep it interesting and fun.